In our world of increasing violence, the most important thing we can do is to “build bridges of hope for ourselves and our children.” Interactions within our families are the keys to our hopes and hunger for long-term loving and caring relationships not only within our families but also with society and global humanity. It is in the family that the next generation learns or doesn’t learn how human wholeness happens. Painful things can happen during childhood years but such experiences need not block the development of wholeness. Blocked experiences may be carried for a lifetime.
The key factor is whether whatever the child feels within has the opportunity to tell its story. Learning to listen to the story under my feelings is a life skill that can be learned in childhood and carried into adulthood. There is the opportunity to grow to feel good about myself and my story even in the midst of difficult times. When feelings are buried, neglected or repressed, the story beneath them cannot be experienced. Their energy remains and impacts behavior negatively.
If we choose, the power is ours to pass on to our children the life-giving skills of focusing that lead to high self-esteem and personal wholeness.
In BioSpiritual Focusing, children learn to listen to their bodies and interact with the direction that comes from within. This is not about trying to “fix” feelings or to “soothe” them over so they go away. More importantly, children learn to trust what is within themselves for answers and meaning as opposed to what they might be told from peers or the media. There is a sense of empowerment that comes from being able to be open to what is inside their bodies. Feelings become doorways to what is deeper, not enemies to be dealt with. Even the most scary feelings have a story under them that contains new insights and pathways for growth. Having learned to trust what is in them, children are less apt to become closed off or secretive. They don’t have to lie or sneak around. This is especially significant in adolescent years when there is a natural questioning and rejecting of parental values.
From a spiritual perspective, a whole life of grace can be opened up in BioSpiritual Focusing. Experiencing the graced moments of felt-shifts leads to a sense of graced living. The Divine becomes a lived experience, not an abstract, mental construct.